DEAR PAPA

Dear Papa, At this point of the journey, it feels like a wilderness. Communion... that's what You desire, I know, but it gets so hard sometimes. Life keeps throwing stuff at me and I know staying on my knees is my best bet, but where do my words fly to? Why don’t I connect with You the way I desire to? I make plans in my head (wake up early, hide somewhere quiet, connect with Papa…) but these plans stay where they are… in my head! Connection… that is so important to You and I sometimes ruin this by making rules and being hard on myself. I tell myself, “If it’s not done this way, it can’t be done!”. Who am I to come to these conclusions? Why lose sight of the One I need to connect to? Yes, I miss those moments when I would wake up in the wee hours of the morning and have sweet fellowship with You but that shouldn't stop me from reaching for You. I often forget that You are everywhere! The place, time, etc, are not set in stone. You are not a hard taskmaster and all  that...

Dear Papa, What is beauty? Many people define beauty by the physical attributes one possesses. They say beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder; so, what do You see when You look at me? Sometimes,I get caught up in the charade of insecurity. There are days I feel beautiful and on other days, I see myself through a seemingly shattered mirror. Do my clothes fit right? Does my hair look good? Do I have to put on make up to look beautiful? These questions flood my mind and they push me to the wall. With the pressure that comes with this Age, it is so hard not to cave in but I don’t want to lose myself in this maze of vanity. Your Word says that all flesh is like grass, and its glory, like the flowers of the field; it will fade away. I can only truly understand what beauty is when I hold on to Your Word that I am Your handiwork and everything You create is beautiful. You formed me and knit me together in my mother’s womb. I am beautiful not because of the shape or size of my body ...